What are the rules on who pays for what date or should the man always pay on dates no matter what? Believe it or not there is etiquette on this and the guidelines will help you both figure it out who pays for what and when they are supposed to pay for it, so no one's feelings get trampled.
It is usually ok to split the check. Some women feel that it is old school or even sexist for the man to pay for everything and in this day and age she is right. Men are not expected to foot the entire bill for the date anymore.
Should the man always pay on dates? Customary rules state that the man is responsible for paying for the first and second dates in their entirety. Some even believe that the man should be responsible for paying for each date until each couple's status has been confirmed. As stated though, these standards have become less stringent in the past few decades due to the women's movement. Women are very capable these days of paying their own way and will not stand for a male chauvinist insisting that things should be the way they always have been.
Consider this, he or she who asks is the one who pays. This just seems right to me. If I was to ask someone out then I would be the one who pays for everything. Just like if a man were to ask me out then I would expect him to pay for everything. It is like receiving a gift from someone, you would not offer to pay for half the gift would you? No, I didn't think so. So, whoever asks, pays, plain and simple.
If the first date went well and the initial anxiety has diminished then things are easy to talk about. If you asked her out for the first date and then asked for a second one, you are the one who should pay for the second date. Be careful that she doesn't just take for granted that you will pay every time, though.
Things do not always have to be so formal, though. When the first date is over then bring it up as a matter for discussion. Come up with your own way of doing things. There is no right or wrong answer here. If the two of you are going to continue seeing each other then it doesn't matter who pays just as long as you have fun and get to know each other well.
If the matter should erupt into an argument then just try to be light and try to come up with a compromise that will work. Do not sit and argue in the restaurant. A woman who has asserted her independence in the business world could have a different, old fashioned opinion of dating. If so, then she will not mind you paying for her night out. But, if she starts to bring out her wallet and wants to pay for herself, let her. Figure it out later, do not make a scene.
Because the question of should the man always pay on dates should not be a deal breaker, either way. If she wants to pay her own way then think of the money you will save.
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