There are a number of things that can go wrong between couples. Of all the factors that can affect a relationship, depression is one of the worst. Why? It can be extremely difficult to treat and when the person is feeling depressed, their mood can affect the whole family.
Depression is a horrible illness not least as sufferers often suffer in silence. They do not realize that there is plenty of help available. With the right support, counseling and sometimes medication, you can beat this illness and become your old self again. But first you have to admit there is a problem.
People with depression are not just sad but feel extremely low. They often struggle to get through the day never mind deal with other people and their emotions. They can feel unloved but only unworthy of being loved. They may want to sleep all day but possibly not be able to sleep at all.
It is very difficult to watch someone you love battle this illness. You can feel completely helpless and perhaps even a little to blame. You may want to shake your partner and tell them to snap out of it. Your relationship will suffer as they won't be capable of showing affection very often and will probably be uncommunicative and miserable a lot of the time.
So what can you do?
The main thing is to try to support your partner at their time of need. Get them medical help. Don't try to brush everything under the carpet. Most cases of depression do not get better on their own without medical intervention. You may not need tablets. Your doctor will be able to recommend a counselor who can assist you to deal with this illness.
Take some time out for yourself as this illness can be contagious. Being around someone who is constantly crying or emotional is challenging for anyone and your mood may suffer. You need to take some time away from the situation in order to preserve your good humor and ability to deal with the situation. Get support for yourself. There are groups and charities available for partners of depressed people where you can express your thoughts, anger or frustration to people who understand and are non judgmental.
Educate yourself on the type of illness your partner has. The more you know about it the more you may be able to help. But do not fall into the trap of telling them how they should be feeling as only they can know that. While they are ill, try to help out more around the house
Try to remain positive. Most episodes last a relatively short period of time and one attack does not mean that it will come back or continue for the rest of your partner's life. Love your partner unconditionally. They are ill and underneath they are the same person you fell in love with. Value your relationship, depression doesn't always last and you will both return to normal one day.
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