Are you wondering how to deal with a break up? Perhaps you weren't ready for the relationship to end but your spouse was and they ended the relationship? If that's the case, then there are two directions you can take: you can refuse to accept the relationship is really over or you can find a way to move on and get on with your life.

If you are convinced that the relationship is not over, that your ex has, in effect, made a mistake in ending the relationship, then you will no doubt be hellbent on rekindling the relationship. It could be that you are deluding yourself and that you are setting yourself up for an even bigger fall, so please bear this in mind. However, if you are sure in your mind that the relationship is not over and you want to find a way to heal the breakup then here are some steps that will help you.

First of all agree to the breakup! Let your ex go with as little drama and fuss as possible. When your ex sees that you're handling the end of your relationship with such maturity, they will be very impressed.

Don't make any contact with your ex once they have left. The last thing you want to do is to be constantly calling your ex and begging and pleading with them to take you back. To continue your appearance of maturity, get on with your life and leave your ex to get on with theirs.

How to deal with a break up means that you appear detached, mature and confident. So, in the weeks and months after the breakup make sure that you spend time looking after yourself emotionally and physically. In that way, when the time is right for you to contact your ex, you are in great shape emotionally and physically.

If, on the other hand, you are ready to move on with your life and you're asking how to deal with a break up from that point of view, then what you should be looking at doing is keeping yourself occupied.

The worst thing that you can do when you're dealing with a breakup is to spend hours and hours on your own. This will only leave you time to brood, reminisce and leave you feeling connected to your ex. So find your friends and socialize with your friends.

If there is something in your life that you've always wanted to do but never had the time or the inclination to do it before, then now is time to get out and do it. This could be anything from taking a trip abroad, enrolling in a class? Or perhaps you have some weight to lose and some fitness to improve? Whatever it is that you need to do to keep your mind off your ex and how you are feeling, then you need to do it.

Whatever route you decide is right for you, you must always give yourself time to begin to understand how to deal with a break up, before you move forward!

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If you have just broken up from a long relationship you are probably getting relationship break up advice from everyone you know. All of your friends and family will rush in to tell you what you should do and you may even have people you don't even know give you advice. Not to mention that there are many sources of advice in magazines, books and online.

The problem with all the advice you receive is that it is general advice to suit everyone when you most likely feel that your situation may be different than others. If you take a relationship quiz your answers will probably tell you to do certain things and everything will be good, but that's not usually the case.

You can listen to the different relationship break up advice you receive but only act on any of it if you feel its right. The quality of advice you receive will also depend on who is giving you the advice and how well they know you and the relationship you were in. Most internet sites give general advice that doesn't specifically relate to your personal situation.

If you look through some women's magazines you will find all sorts of information about relationships and many quizzes. It certainly doesn't hurt to read this information or take the quizzes as long as you don't take the information they give too seriously.

Even your friends and family will tend to know you more than they knew your ex so the advice that they give will be based on how well they know you and not how well they knew your relationship. It is very difficult for anyone to give advice unless they know both you and your ex really well and are close enough to you to know all about your relationship.

Then there are people who may give biased advice because they know your ex better and give advice that is more beneficial to your ex. There may even be people that will give bad advice because they want your relationship to stay broken up.

Seeking advice from a counselor can be beneficial as the advice is impartial and a relationship counselor is trained to help couples mend broken relationships.

Although a counselor doesn't know you and doesn't know the ins and outs of your relationship, there are certain things that are universal. For example, if you broke up after some harsh words spoken during a fight, then it's very possible that you both said things you didn't mean and broke up in the heat of the moment. A counselor can help you to see this and deal with it.

When talking to a counselor you will often reveal any feelings of unhappiness you have had and any issues that have been developing over some time. If your relationship has been suffering for a while but you haven't talked about it then it was only a matter of time before a break up happened. Good communication is essential for a healthy, strong relationship and a counselor can get you on track to communicate better.

Whatever the reason for your break up, receiving relationship break up advice from a counselor can be really helpful to mend the broken relationship and make it strong again.

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If your relationship is going through a rough patch and it is one of many rough patches you may be concerned that you are heading for divorce. Sometimes divorce can't be avoided, it will depend on the couple and the situation, but there are many times that you can work toward healing your relationship before it reaches the point for divorce.

One mistake many people make is that they start making promises. They start saying things like 'that will never happen again', 'I will fix everything' or 'I have changed'. These are just empty promises and actually make the person sound a little desperate and a bit insincere. Even if you believe you are sincere and that you can change, statements like these will not save your relationship.

Actions speak louder than words. It would benefit you more to start showing the changes you are willing to make instead of promising to make them. Don't just say that you have changed but actually take steps to change. You do need to discuss the problems with your partner though because you can't just change who you are to make them happy, you need to be happy too. Often there are problems that both parties need to work with to improve the relationship.

Telling your partner that you love him constantly is not a good idea either. Even if it is true and you do love him, saying it constantly won't fix any problems. In fact telling him that you love him can be seen as a bit of emotional blackmail – when all else fails say 'I love you' – it doesn't quite work like that. It isn't the miracle cure for a failing marriage.

When a relationship is in trouble it can be stressful and you may find yourself an emotional wreck. This is another reason why you shouldn't keep telling him that you love him because it will just drain him more emotionally. Telling him that you love him is something you should save for when you have your relationship back on track.

Another big mistake when a relationship is in trouble is to constantly argue. When you yell and scream at each other and only worry about getting your point across and not listen to what the other person is saying, then this doesn't get you anywhere. All it does is add more tension to the relationship and nobody wins these arguments. If you continually point out your partners faults to him and constantly tell him he is wrong, he will not want to try very hard to resolve any issues. However, if you calmly discuss the issues and let him know that you care about his feelings too then he will be more willing to work on saving your marriage.

Do not start any arguments with your husband and if he starts one then walk away. When he has calmed down then ask him if he'd like to discuss matters. Don't approach the marriage like a competition to find who is best at relationships and who is to blame for it failing, approach it like a partnership that you both need to help each other with.

If your marriage is heading for divorce then sit down with your husband and calmly talk about any problems you have. Don't argue with him but ask him what he is feeling and how he thinks you can improve the marriage. Take his answers into consideration along with your own feelings and try to work some compromise that will make you both happy. You can prevent a divorce if you handle the problem in a mature and calm way.

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If you are in a relationship where your partner has cheated you may be wondering if a relationship after cheating is possible. There really is no set answer to this question. There are many factors that will come into play.

Here are a few of the questions you need to ask yourself as you try to decide what is the best option for you, your partner, and your relationship:

1. Do you want to stay in the relationship?
This is often the most obvious, and the most difficult, question to answer. You know yourself, and your partner and how you truly feel. Rebuilding a relationship after infidelity will take a lot of time, a lot of patience, a lot of trust, and most of all, a lot of love.

If you don't feel like you can honestly bring those traits to the table you will probably not be able to stick with it long enough to heal the wounds. It might be best to just call it quits.

2. One consideration is the long term viability of the relationship in general:
While no one has the right to cheat, if your partner has always been honest and faithful but just had a moment of weakness, particularly if the relationship was in a bad place at the time, you might be able to move on with the relationship.

Of course that would depend on the reason the relationship was in a bad place to begin with. If it was just a 'normal' rough patch than that's one thing, but if the relationship is over, but neither of you really wants to admit it, that is another thing.

Figuring all this out will be difficult, especially when you are dealing with the pain of betrayal, but it is important to try to take a step back to see things more clearly.

Seeing things more clearly can be helped along by enlisting the help of a counselor or therapist, an objective third party that can help guide you through these questions and come up with honest answers.

3. It will take time:
No one should expect to fix a broken relationship in a few weeks, or even a few months. Building trust the second time, after someone has already betrayed you , is even harder than building it the first time.

You have to allow yourself time to get some clarity so you can decide what you want to do. Oftentimes the cheating partner will try to rush things. They do this for two main reasons, one, they feel guilty and the sooner you are 'back to normal' the sooner some of that guilt will fade, and two, they know that if you are able to grieve for a time and get clarity it's highly likely you'll decide to end the relationship and they may not want that, despite the fact that they cheated.

So, if your partner has cheated and you want to decide if a relationship after cheating is still possible, just consider some of these points. Going through infidelity in a relationship can be one of the most painful and difficult things you will ever go through. But you will get through it, and it's important to try to make the best decisions you can so that you will be able to find happiness, with or without your partner, in the future.

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Look up any problem you may be having and you will find plenty of relationship advice online. But how do you know whether you can trust it or not?

I guess the answer to that question is does it make sense to you? If the person giving the advice has opinions and thoughts that are the opposite of what you personally believe in then you are not going to have much faith in them.

However, if someone strikes a chord with you, you will probably listen to them. Personally I believe that it is important that the relationship advice online is provided by someone who has helped other couples already. How will you know if that has happened? You should see plenty of testimonials from happy clients or readers of the website. If twenty couples have benefited from the advice they received, it can't all be bad right?

Relationships are by their nature very personal things. Sure there are some common themes in successful ones. Mutual respect, trust, caring, sexual attraction and love are just a few of them. You cannot expect a partnership to survive without these. It would be the same as expecting a plant to live without sunshine and water.

If you and your other half are having problems, you need to address the issues and soon. You cannot just ignore them as they tend to grow rapidly and can eventually cause you to split up. You have the option of going for counseling either separately or together but sometimes people do not want to sit opposite a stranger for fear they will judge them. If you feel like this, the anonymity of contacting someone online will be very attractive to you.

So how do you keep the relationship healthy so you can minimise your chances of needing relationship advice online or otherwise? You need to treat each other with care. You are both individual human beings with your own needs, wants and desires. Sometimes it can be easy to take each other for granted. Your partner may start feeling left out as you go about saving the world and its problems. Or you may be very busy at work and too tired to make time for them when you do get home.

Try arranging a date night at least once a week for you two to share some fun and conversation. You must set up some rules before hand for example, you have to behave like you did when you were dating i.e. no talk of the kids, the row you had last week or your mother in law. You should dress up and make an effort just as you would on a date. And don't put pressure on each other to end up in the bedroom. You should make more of an effort in the bedroom department too but it is only one part of your overall partnership.

If you are having problems, why not try relationship advice online. After all you have more to gain than you can lose!

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If you have been unfaithful you may now be wondering if you can save a relationship after infidelity. It is possible to save a relationship after one partner has been unfaithful but it will require hard work. Both couples must be willing to work toward improving and saving the relationship. The partner who has been unfaithful needs to explain their reasons and why they are unhappy within the relationship and the partner who has been cheated on will need to find a way to forgive.

If you decide to go to counseling, one of the first questions you will be asked is whether you really feel that your relationship is worth saving. Although you have both agreed to seek counseling so assume that you both feel the relationship is worth the effort, but it is possible that one person may be agreeing to counseling just to please the other.

Quite often it is the partner who has had the affair that only agrees to go to counseling to please their partner. They agree to counseling because they are feeling guilty and feel that they owe it to their partner to do whatever it takes to save this relationship.

There are a lot of couples that find themselves in couple counseling faced with this situation – that the cheating partner is only there to please the other partner but in reality they aren't really sure that the relationship is worth saving. So it is important that both partners take a good look at the situation and be honest about whether they do want to work hard at saving the relationship.

One of the hardest things a couple will ever have to do is to heal a relationship that has broken as a result of infidelity. It is not a matter of saying you are sorry and that you'll never do it again; there is must more to it than that.

Firstly, the reason for the affair, or affairs, need to be given. Affairs may happen purely for sexual reasons and sometimes they may happen because a person is unhappy in their current relationship. You need to decide what the reason was for the infidelity so you can take steps to make sure it doesn't happen again.

If you can identify the reason then you have a much greater chance of healing a relationship after infidelity than if you can't. If you had an affair for sexual reasons then perhaps you need to work on your sex life as a couple. If you and your partner are not satisfying one another sexually then there are things that you can do to improve your sexual relations. It is better to work at improving your sex life with your partner than to go and just find a new partner to have an affair with.

If you are generally unhappy in the relationship then this needs to be addressed. There are many reasons why one can become unhappy in a relationship and it may depend on the reason as to whether you can resolve the issue or not. You need to discuss with your partner why you are unhappy so you can both work toward making things better. The only way to find happiness again is to have open communication and let each other know how you are feeling.

It can be helpful to talk about these things with a counselor so they can help you work through your feelings and problems together. They can also help to keep the conversation going and to stop a conversation if it is turning into one big argument. A counselor can help you to understand what the other person is saying and feeling.

It is difficult to fix a relationship after infidelity but it is possible. If your relationship is worth saving then you need to put in the effort to save it.

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What is a wife led relationship? Sure there may be times when you simply agree to your wife's decisions (often to stop her nagging) but that isn't typically what is referred to as a wife led relationship. This type of relationship is more when the wife becomes the dominant partner and the husband is completely submissive.

There are different degrees to wife led relationships with some having the wife only mildly dominant and perhaps only in certain circumstances. Then there are the more severe situations when the man is like a slave to the woman and does everything she requests. The man will make no decisions whatsoever regarding anything in the relationship or the home; it will all be done by the woman. The man will basically be a slave to the woman. They will appear reasonably normal in public but you will still find that the woman is making the decisions.

Some men actually like being the submissive one in the relationship and may find themselves not being as submissive as they like because the wife isn't all that comfortable with it. In a lesser degree of being submissive a man may just hand over the major decision making to his wife but still have some control himself.

Although some women enjoy being the dominant party, some women will find it very off putting, particularly if you are asking her to be the fully dominant partner, which is what a true wife led relationship is. The man is a slave to the woman and will do everything for her.

The man will do all the chores, cleaning and cooking around the house and she may bark out orders to him and he will run and do them. Although she may want to help out around the house, men that like this type of relationship will want her to expect him to do it all. They enjoy being treated like a slave.

In a wife led relationship the woman has complete control over their sexual relationship also. The man will actually expect her to use sex as a reward for completing his chores or even as a punishment when he doesn't please her. If a woman does a chore in the home the man may be disappointed because he cannot do that chore himself and be rewarded for it.

If the wife is please with her husband's performance with his chores then she will reward him by pleasing him sexually and this is what the man looks forward to. However, if she is not happy with her husband's work around the home then she may deny him pleasure of his own while he has to please her and give her pleasure.

Some men will like the sexual side of a wife led relationship and even enjoy when pleasure is withheld as it makes it more exciting when they are rewarded next. Other men aren't as interested in the sexual enjoyment of a wife led relationship but just like the idea of the woman being the dominant partner and making the decisions.

If you think you would like to try a wife led relationship then certainly discuss the idea with your wife. She may be pleased to join in if you are offering to do more around the home but be prepared for her to treat you like a slave.

You can give it a test run and see how it goes and if you both enjoy it then you might continue to have an enjoyable wife led relationship.

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Fair to say you're reading this because you can see a break up coming and you're wondering what you can do before relationship break up actually comes your way. Well the good news is that there are steps you can take to save your relationship if that's really what you want to do.

First of all consider what you think might be wrong. What has caused you to think a break up is on the cards? Do you suspect your partner of cheating? Do you feel an emotional distance between you and your partner? Or have you been arguing a lot more than you ever have before and you really don't know why?

Finding the answers to these questions, or which ever questions fit your particular situation, is key. Once you start asking the right questions, then you have a really strong chance of saving your relationship before relationship break up hits.

So, are you making real quality time for your relationship? Because without a doubt, this is often the number one reason that couples separate and relationships end. If you do not make time for your relationship an emotional distance distance will appear between you and your partner and before you know it, that space which you should have filled, will now be filled by someone else or something else.

Before relationship break up happens, make sure that you are not falling into the trap of finding fault in everything that your partner does. This is a classic sign of dissatisfaction with yourself. Whatever you feel you are failing at: career, finances, emotional relationships and even how you feel about yourself, this could lead you to take out your dissatisfaction with yourself on your other half. If there is something that is wrong in your life, sort it out.

If you have genuine reasons to be upset with your partner, then make sure you strike a balance between concern and criticism. No one likes to be told what they're doing wrong 24/7! Don't focus on the minor wrongs, that way when there is something really important that you find unacceptable, then you can bring it up safe in the knowledge that it's not just a long line of what you consider to be your partner's wrongs!

Above all, before relationship breakup really hits, make sure that you sit down with your partner and talk openly about your fears and concerns. Whatever you do don't avoid and don't pretend everything is all right. You never know, you've noticed that all is not well, perhaps your partner has also noticed too.

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Are you really struggling after a relationship breakup? Well you're not alone. Anyone who says it's easy to deal with a breakup is either faking it or they were never really in love. The truth is, when a relationship breaks up, there is often a lot of heartache and trauma. How you deal with that is completely dependent on whether you want to rekindle your relationship or you simply want to find a way to move on and live your life without your ex.

Assuming you actually want to make up with your ex, there are some simple steps that you can take to make this happen. Obviously there will be days and weeks when you are on your own after relationship breakup, but the last thing that you should do during this time is to panic and despair.

What's good to know is that it is these days and weeks, that will prepare you for a successful make up with your ex and, more importantly, help you keep them. So accept that your relationship has broken up and do so without panicking.

Your next move should be to start thinking about what went wrong. The only way you are going to successfully make up with your ex, is if you explore honestly and clearly, what went wrong. If you made a mistake and don't know how to put things right, then that's the first thing you'll have to deal with. If you cheated on your ex then you need to explore for yourself why. If your mistake was that you didn't spend enough time with your ex, then you need to look closely at your schedule and decide what you can change to prove to your ex that you are serious about them.

Another point that you should keep in mind is that for some people it's all too easy to stick with what they know rather than take that leap and move on with their lives. After relationship breakup ask yourself these questions: "Do you really want to make up with your ex because you love them? Do you want to make up with your ex because it's easier than moving on?"

To answer these questions honestly you will really have to do some soul searching. Above all, don't try and rekindle a toxic relationship. The unknown is often scary, but if your relationship was not good for you or your ex, then you should seriously think about moving on. This will take courage, but in the long run it will be the right thing to do.

Whatever you decide to do after relationship breakup, remember, you do have a golden moment to really stop and think and consider which way you want to go: do you want to rekindle the relationship or is it time to move on?

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When a marriage hits the rocks, one of the easiest situations to find yourself in is having an affair! Relationships with people outside your marriage or long term relationship are often more appealing than staying faithful to spouses and partners. Affairs are new, exciting and a reminder that we are still vital and desired people. These are the compelling reasons why so many people find themselves having an affair. The downside of an affair only ever faced when things get out of hand.

If you are considering an affair, relationships are about to become difficult for you. Whether that relationship be your long-term one or for that matter, the affair you're embarking on. You might think that your long-term relationship is bad now but just wait until your partner/spouse discovers you've been cheating on them.

Your spouse will feel betrayed, angry and devastated. Yes, the affair will devastate your marriage. Instead of turning to someone outside your relationship remember the promises you made. No marriage or relationship is without problems, the trick is to work at remaining focused and committed when these problems hit. So turn to your spouse or your partner instead of some seemingly appealing outsider.

Explain clearly to your spouse how you feel. Just because you are feeling this way about your relationship/marriage, it doesn't mean it's the same for your spouse/partner. They may very well have no idea you feel the relationship is in trouble, the only way you will know for sure is if you talk to them.

It is crucial that you both take the time to listen to each other. Avoid judging and criticizing each other, because this will not make either of you feel you can be open and honest about your feelings. If your spouse feels they are going to be mocked or criticized, then they will clam up. Equally so will you.

If you have already embarked upon an affair, then you need to weigh up what you want. Perhaps the marriage is well and truly over? You will only know this if you explore with honesty and sincerity how you feel. There is no good for either you or your partner in staying in a marriage/relationship that is just not working. If the relationship/marriage is toxic then the answer is to end it and with as little harm as possible.

Affair? Relationships? They both take time and effort and opting for an affair is not necessarily the easiest option youcould take. Whatever you're doing, and whoever you're doing it with, there at least three sets of feelings involved. Your lover might be casual about what they're doing in the beginning, but attachments are easily and quickly formed and before you know it, your lover could be putting all kinds of demands around what they want from you.

Think long and hard about the problems in your marriage/relationship. Is your relationship worth fighting for? If it is then you must do everything you can to avoid anaffair! Relationships can be greatly rewarding and an affaircan be deeply devastating.

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