Relationship Sites Use Your Head And Heart

I believe that in some ways the internet has created problems for us as a society. Why? Because there is too much information and we don't know where to start? No. I believe it's a problem because we tend to rely too heavily on the information we get online. We stop using our own heads and hearts. Using online relationship sites to get advice about your relationship isn't a bad thing…as long as you never stop using your own head.

Everyone has an opinion. Some of them make sense, though you may not agree with them, and some just sound completely stupid. Sometimes I worry that with so many opinions floating around we forget to consider our own opinion. So before you start using online sties, this is my word of caution to you: not everyone who claims to be an 'expert' really is.

Not every 'expert' can possibly know everything about their chosen subject. The important thing for you to remember is to get various opinions, but at the end of the day stop, take some time and listen to what your head and heart are telling you. If you listen to yourself, honestly, you will hardly ever make a mistake.

There are many sites online that will have advice on relationships or even give you the opportunity to meet the person of your dreams.

If you want to find some help on your relationship issues you may want to do a search for forums on relationships. Find some and take a little time to 'lurk' in the forum without leaving a comment. Just get a feel for the type of people and topics discussed at the forum. If you like what you see you may want to start interacting by posing your question.

A lot of people will actually find it easier to open up online because of the anonymity they have. No one knows who you so it can sometimes be easier to open up about certain subjects. If that's the case for you than by all means, use a forum to provide you with the help you need. Just remember what I said above about using your own common sense.

Online chat rooms can be another resource that may be able to help you out. Here you will have real time conversations with other members. Just like with the forums you can still be completely anonymous if you choose. You can even make 'friends' in a chat room.

Of course, you do have to be careful since you don't really know who you're talking to. That middle aged woman from Tennessee could actually be a middle aged man from Chicago. Just make sure you don't give out any details that someone could use to locate you in real life.

But if you feel like the information and advice they are giving you makes sense, than by all means use it. One of the great things about these types of sites is that everyone has their own experiences to share. The odds of you finding someone who is in the same situation as you, or better yet, has overcome the same situation that you are currently in and can provide some real answers, is much better when you have dozens or even hundreds of people right there in the chat room.

There are all kinds of relationship sites online and they may be able to help you with whatever you're dealing with. Just remember to always use your own head, heart, and opinion first and you'll be fine.


 

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Done With Dating-Not Always A Bad Idea

If you just had another break up and have decided that you are done with dating that might not be such a bad idea, for now. No one says you can't take a break now and then. The dating world can be brutal, at times. Sometimes you just need to take a step back and breathe for a while.

Take some time for yourself and just relax no one says you always have to have the trophy on your arm. Well, they might say it but it isn't true. Learn to be yourself and for yourself, first. You are the important one here. Figure out who you are without that trophy on your arm or in your bed. This may be difficult for some of you reading this.

Learning to be alone can be somewhat of an ordeal and you may not like it at first, but you will get used to it and may eventually even learn to like it. It is all up to you, actually. If you sit around moping all the time then you will not learn to like it one bit but if you get out and see the world in your own way with your own eyes without having someone to answer to then you will see that you can survive on your own.

That is the best part of being done with dating, by the way. Not having anyone to answer to, coming and going as you please and not having someone looking over your shoulder at every turn no matter what you do.

Maybe that wasn't it at all, maybe the ones you were with let you have your space. Maybe you are just tired of your relationships not working out. Then by all means, take a break, you deserve it. Do some self maintenance, learn something new so you have something new to bring to the table next time you decide to get involved in a relationship.

I know you may think that is all easier said than done but look at it this way, if you join a gym or take a class at the local community college you may just meet the one you were meant to be with and how great would that be? To finally have a relationship you could be proud of and really want to show off the new guy or gal to your friends would be absolutely awesome.

So what are you going to do? Not jump right into another dead end relationship with the same type of person, right? You are going to do some inner work on you first and then you are going to join a gym and get in shape or you are going to take a class at the community college and learn something new.

Anything you can do to feel like you are growing a little will be a big boost to your system and help you become a better person. You will gain more confidence and that confidence will be very attractive to your next would be partner. You will hold yourself differently and you will be noticed. So be done with dating for a while but not forever, the perfect one for you is out there.


 

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Depression And Dating -Tips To Help Cope

Severe clinical depression is a condition that affects several million Americans and many others suffer from a milder form of depression that may include a diagnosis of anxiety. Dating can be a pain in the behind for healthy individuals but even though depression and dating can present you with a whole different set of problems, there are ways to cope with your depression while dating.

First, if you were prescribed medication for your depression be sure to take it as it as prescribed. If anxiety is a part of your depressive state then make sure and take your anti-anxiety medication before your date to lessen the chance you will lose control on the date.

A typical first date lasts three hours, anyone can make it through three hours. If you find yourself getting into some trouble and can't control your anxiety, just excuse yourself from the table and go to the bathroom. Take a paper towel and wet it then place it on the back of your neck and do some deep breathing to calm yourself. Only when you are ready should you return to the table to resume your date.

You have done everything right, you spent the time making sure your clothes, hair and make-up were perfect. You have nothing to worry about. Everything is going great, you will be fine as long as you don't do anything to sabotage this date. Do not talk about anything too heavy if especially if this is your first date. You will scare off your date quicker than anything if you do this.

Try to stay laid back and have some fun. If you concentrate on enjoying yourself and enjoying the other person your depression and dating will not become an issue. If the relationship continues on further then you will have to divulge that you are dealing with depression but it does not have to be brought up on the first date.

While on your date do not try to force anything, keep expectations off the table. Just let things flow and let the date work itself out. If there is some attraction then that's good, just do not act too clingy or needy. Your date will pick up on this neediness and won't just run away, they will run away screaming. Keep yourself to yourself and just go home after the date.

After a while when you feel comfortable with this person, tell them you are dealing with depression and that you take medication everyday for it. They will see that you are doing all you can to stay healthy and will applaud you for your efforts.

If your depression is a true chemical imbalance, you will need to continue taking your medication for the rest of your life but, on the other hand, if your depression is situational then you may be able to stop the medication at some point and just keep seeing your therapist. This can be true especially if you find the love of your life and they are willing and able to help you through the rough patches.

Depression and dating is possible, you just have to be strong enough to handle both at the same time.


 

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Relationship Breakups Before And After They Happen And How To Cope

When it comes to relationship breakups before and after, there are two questions that need answering. "Why?" and "What's next?"

There is no doubt that dealing with relationship breakups before and after they happen, is a very traumatic and stressful time. It doesn't matter whether you were ready for the relationship to end or not, when it comes to a relationship ending there is still the same trauma, still the same upset.

Now, if your relationship hasn't actually ended yet, but it's on the verge of ending, then make sure you do your best to go through the coming days, weeks and months with as little drama as you can possibly manage. One of the classic mistakes that many people make, when faced with an imminent breakup, is to cause drama and upset. This is an understandable reaction, because they're upset and devastated at the ending of a relationship that they put so much hope into. However, control is key, especially if you have any hopes of rekindling your relationship in the future. Causing ructions and drama at the onset of the breakup will not help you further down the line.

So in regards to relationship breakups before and after, even if you're not ready for the relationship to end, agree to the breakup. Let your partner go and wish them well. Tell them that you're sorry for any mistakes you have made and that you wish you could've done things differently, but you accept their decision to end the relationship.

Something else that you should consider in answer to the "Why?" question is this: even if you have no interest in trying to rekindle the relationship, it might still be worthwhile exploring why the relationship ended. Answering this question is really a positive step forward for you and for any future relationship that you may enter.

Look closely at your behavior throughout the relationship. Try and pinpoint moments and incidences where you felt you could've handled the situation better. Be as honest with yourself as possible. If you and your ex have parted on fairly good terms then why not ask your ex how they felt you handled yourself in the relationship. Not only will this give you some great insight into how others/your ex sees you, but again, it's good food for thought for the future.

For some, when it comes to relationship breakups before and after, a wise move is to move on. Let's be honest, not all relationships are worth saving. For a variety of reasons, some relationships are just better over and done with. If you think your relationship falls into this category, then After the breakup give yourself as much time as you need to grieve the end of your relationship and then do just that, move on!


 

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Dating Relationships In Todays Times- Pro And Cons

Do you think dating relationships in todays times are easier or harder? In my opinion, I think there are pros and cons. In some ways connecting is easier than ever before, but there are some serious drawbacks to our society when it comes to really getting to know someone.

On the plus side, we have more ways than ever for meeting someone we may actually have something in common with. With all the social networking sites online like Facebook and Twitter, staying in touch is easy.

It's also easy to find people who share the same interests with you on these sites. That's not even counting all the online dating sites that can match you as much, or as little, as you like with other people.

All that, and cell phones too, can make it easy to meet people who you may not have had the opportunity to meet in your day to day life before. Being able to meet people from all over your hometown, state or the world, can certainly open up your possibilities, but it does come with a cost.

Even though dating relationships in todays times make it easier to find people, people you may never have had the chance to meet in the past, it can also make it harder to establish a real connection.

Even if the two of you are able to meet and go out on a date, the constant ringing of a cell phone can make it harder to really carry on a conversation and get to know each other.

We also live in a very hectic, high stress time. That can take it's toll on any relationships, not just your romantic ones. Being really able to get to know others and shut out the day to day distractions and stress can be a real challenge.

With it so easy to meet new people, that also takes away some of the necessity to really try to work out issues in a relationship. For example, if you and your significant other start having problems, a "replacement" can be just a few clicks away. Our high tech society has made it easier to bail on difficult situations since it's easier than ever to "go out" and meet someone new.

So, for anyone who is dating at this time in their life, you can make the rules for yourself. Use all the technology as a great way to meet people you may never have been able to meet in the past. Venture out past your comfort zone, meet someone from a different culture or country. Use technology to your advantage.

But, you don't have to let the distractions and the stress that all that technology can bring cause problems. You set your own limits. It's up to you. Try to meet people with similar outlooks.

For example, if you think it's rude to text during a date (it is, unless it's a true emergency) only date people who feel the same way you do, with so many places to look, it shouldn't be too hard to find someone like you.

There are good and bad points to dating relationships in todays times, just find ways to get the best while avoiding the worst.


 

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Relationship Article Pointers To Keep Love Burning

In this relationship article I'm going to give you some pointers, that if followed, could help you keep your relationship strong and loving. I will include a list of three things you can do that will make your partner feel loved and respected.

One word of caution though: while this list focuses on how you can treat your partner, it's also vitally important that your partner does the same things for you. I'm not encouraging a one sided relationship. Those never work, or at least they don't work from the standpoint that one partner isn't getting their needs met so the relationship isn't a healthy one.

In a strong healthy relationship both partners should be getting the majority of their needs met. They should feel love, respect, friendship, understanding, and desire coming from their partner. They should be giving those same things back too.

So before you plow into the list I want you to take some time to evaluate who you are as a person. Make sure that you are able to give and take equally. This is so important because in most relationships one person is the primary giver and one person is the primary taker. That is not good. Ideally both parties should be fairly close to a 50/50 split between what they give and what they take. That's what I want you to strive for.

Don't be the one who does all the giving, or most of it. And don't be the one who does all the taking, or most of it. Try to balance yourself and encourage your partner to do the same.

OK, now on to the list:

1. Ultimately we all want to feel like our partner actually likes us. So make sure you take time to have fun with your partner. Share your day with them. Tell them the good things, and the bad things. Have some laughs together.

2. Help build your partner up. You don't have to lie…if they ask you if they've gained weight, and they have, you don't have to say 'no' but you could say that they look good to you. (by the way, never ask a loaded, stupid, question like 'do I look fat in this"? No good can ever come of it!)

3. Too many relationships lose physical intimacy, and I don't just mean sex. When you and your partner were dating you most likely held hands, rubbed each other's hands or backs, basically you couldn't keep your hands off of each other. You just had to be close and touching as much as possible. Don't let that slip away. Never underestimate the power of a gentle touch and other physical contact.

And while sex is important, don't let all your physical contact become only sexual in nature. You should always enjoy touching your partners cheek or sneaking up behind them and putting your arms around them for a hug.

I know that if you use some of the ideas I've given you in this relationship article that you can be one step closer to maintaining a strong loving relationship with your partner. Just try to maintain some of the wonder, and love you had for your partner when you first met. By doing that you have a much better chance of keeping your relationship strong and happy for your whole life.


 

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Dating Advice For Women-Use Your Common Sense

I don't really know for sure, but my guess would be that if you did a search online for the term "dating advice for women", you would get a ton of results. The problem is that most of the advice you get wouldn't be worth too much.

I'm not a psychologist but I am a little older and have had some experiences, some good and some not so good, that I can share with you and hopefully help you avoid making bad mistakes.

I see several of my friends who are miserable because they ignored some common sense dating advice for women. If you aren't going to pay attention anyway the best advice in the world won't do you any good, so I hope you pay attention.

Here are some tips you need to keep in mind:

1. If you want to have successful relationships, you need to be capable of having successful relationships. I know it sounds like I'm talking in riddles but what I mean is actually pretty simple: you need to be a secure, confidant women.

If you are overly needy (I know we all have our moments, but it shouldn't happen all the time) or insecure than you are going to attract a certain type of guy. What type of guy? Well, more than likely not the kind who will make you happy unless you enjoy being treated like crap.

You see, confidant, well adjusted men will not be attracted to needy women. The type of man who will be attracted to needy women is an insecure guy who likes being with needy women so he can control them and push them around.

Get yourself together first.

2. Don't ignore early warning signs. This is another huge mistake many women make. There are almost always signs of problems early in the relationship, but women are either so desperate (though few would admit it) that they ignore them. They chalk up these disturbing signs to the fact that "no one is perfect", or "he's having a bad day".

You can tell alot about anyone by the way they treat people they come into contact with. If your new guy is rude and impatient when you are out to dinner, do you really believe that he won't act that way, or worse, when the two of you are alone? If so, why would you think that?

If the guy is mean or rude it's just a matter of time until he takes it out on you. He may or may not get physical but verbal abuse is no picnic either. Why would you ignore such an obvious warning sign when it's still early enough to get out unscathed? Run, don't walk.

Look, you are a smart, funny, decent women (OK, I don't really know you but I'm guessing it's true) why would you subject yourself to being in a relationship with someone who isn't man enough to fully appreciate you and all you have to offer?

Are you really that desperate that you would allow some insecure guy to treat you like garbage? If you are, your first step should be counseling and hold off on the dating for a while.

And that, my friend, is darn good dating advice for women.


 

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Dating Advice For Short Men Help Is On The Way

Hey guys, if you are looking for some great
dating advice for short men, I'm going to help you out. I'm going to give basically the same advice I give to women or anyone else. It doesn't matter how tall you are, or aren't, if you want to have meaningful,successful relationships it all starts with you.

Some short guys like to date women who are shorter than them, some short guys are perfectly fine dating taller women. Look at Hollywood, there are some very famous couples where the women is quite a bit taller than the guy.
It totally doesn't matter except to the two people in the relationship.

Having said that, and I promised you the same advice I give anyone else, so this really is more than just
dating advice for short men, here you go:

1. To really have a meaningful and successful relationship you need to have two secure, confidant people in the relationship. If one or both of you has a lot of hangups and insecurities the relationship will either fail entirely, and / or make you both miserable.

None of us are perfect, we all have our issues which is ok… to a point. When we are ruled by those issues, those insecurities, that's when it can become a huge problem in any relationship, not just the romantic types.

Your best bet is to make yourself the best man you can be. Don't think that means you have to be perfect, no one is, but you can certainly do everything in your power to make sure you go through life with a positive attitude and knowing and liking who you are as a person.

2. While it is very important to become a decent man so you aren't accused of suffering from "short mans disease" you can still do other things to give yourself a little extra height if you want. There are some shoes on the market that actually have lifts on the inside of the shoe which can add a few inches to your height.

They are totally hidden from the outside of the shoe so no one will know you have them on. If you think you would feel better about yourself with a couple of extra inches than you should check them out to find out more about them.

Men and women come in all shapes and sizes and I truly believe that it's true that there is someone for everyone. The best thing you can do for yourself is to just find the woman that is perfect for you. One thing that I see men (tall and short) do all the time is try to go after women who are out of their league.

You know the guys I'm talking about, the guys who aren't really that good looking or who aren't really in very good shape and they will mock and ridicule a woman who isn't really that good looking or isn't really in that good of shape. To increase your odds of success look for women who are in the same league as you are, that is good dating advice for short men, or any man for that matter.


 

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Perfect Relationships – Is There Any Such Animal

Don't hold out for perfect relationships because you'll only be disappointed. So many people sabotage their chances at love because they place their loved one and/or their relationship on a pedestal.

Until you change your definition of what perfect is you are doomed to failure again and again. You will also cause yourself and anyone you enter into a relationship with, a lot of pain.

No one is perfect, but someone can be perfect for you. There is a difference. The sooner you can make that distinction the sooner you'll have a real shot at having a great, loving relationship.

To get a better idea of what someone who is perfect for you would like, I've compiled a list of some of the most commonly desired traits in a partner. Of course your ideas could be different but these traits are fairly common and they provide a good place to start in examining what you consider perfect.

1.Understanding:
People are comfortable with someone who 'gets' them. If you sing in the shower, like weird food combination's, or just like to act goofy sometimes, you'll want a partner who can play along with you.

Everyone has their own little quirks and your perfect partner will, at the minimum, accept those quirks without making fun of you and at best will have the same or similar quirks. You won't want someone who will roll their eyes or ridicule you whenever you do these things. They should love you, and accept you, just as you are.

2. Good self esteem:
One of the biggest problems I see in relationships is when one party is insecure. This insecurity is often hidden and it can come across as many other things. Very often someone who is overly sexual or overly aggressive is actually just trying to compensate for and cover up a very strong sense of insecurity.

As you get to know someone keep a close eye out for their actions, this will tell you a lot. For example, how do they react when something embarrassing happens? Do they get angry, defensive? Do they lash out at you, this should be a huge, huge, red flag. Or do they laugh and shrug and go along with it good naturedly. If they do the latter it probably means that they are a secure confidant person, and that is a trait you want to look for in a partner.

3. Outlook:
Do they share similar views on things that are important to you? You don't have to agree on everything. It's possible some relationships can thrive even if both parties are very different in many of their views; though it will only work if both parties are mature and secure and don't feel threatened that the other one doesn't agree with them on various issues.

For the most part though, it will work better if you and your potential partner have a common ground on the main issues, your core beliefs. If you value honesty and fidelity, for example, you won't be happy with someone who lies and cheats.

Believe it or not, it's actually pretty easy to find perfect relationships, or at least perfect for you. The problem is that people see what they want to see and not what is really there. I know it can be hard, especially in the beginning, but it's important for the long term health and happiness of the relationship that you take off the blinders and see your partner as they really are, not as you want them to be.


 

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Dating Advice For Men By Women- May Be Helpful

Hey guys, want to know what women really think? Want some
dating advice for men by women and not some made up garbage by some advertiser who is just trying to get you to buy their product? If you're ready, read on.

First of all you have to never forget one very obvious, and I suspect often overlooked fact – all women are different. Let me repeat that, all women are different. Do many of them share some common traits? Of course, but each of us also has our own unique personality and experiences… just like you do.

If you really want to be successful at meeting women and having great relationships, you must fight the urge to lump them all into the chocolate eating, shoe loving, Chardonnay drinking category. I can assure you, not all women drink Chardonnay!

If you view, and treat, women like that you are really shortchanging yourself and missing out on an opportunity to meet some really amazing people.

Some other, really good, dating advice for men by women
is to treat her like you would like to be treated. OK, I know I just triggered a flashback to your Sunday school days, but it's true. If you wouldn't like it if someone promised to call you then never called, don't do that to anyone else.

If you don't want to have to deal with clingy, needy women then don't date clingy needy women. Simple and effective.

The truth is that we are all guilty, whether we are men or women, of not being totally honest about who we are and what we want.

While any of us could get stuck with the occasional well camouflaged dud, for the most part if you keep dating women who are needy it's because on some level that's what you like.

Don't get mad, it's true. Maybe confidant, independent women threaten you in some way. Maybe you are more comfortable with someone who is very needy. I don't know, but think about it. If the same thing keeps happening over and over again, it can't be called a coincidence.

Another thing to remember is that most women love sex too. But, for many women, it's not quite as easy to separate the physical from the emotional as it seems to be (I said seems to be) for some guys. Again, find out who the woman you are with is. Find out what she wants, what she likes and what she doesn't like. It's not really that difficult.

If you don't go into any given situation with pre conceived ideas you may just find that the woman you are going out on a date with really is fun to talk to.

The best piece of advice that any of us, man or woman, can get or follow is to just treat everyone with dignity and respect. When we do that, things tend to fall into place pretty easily more times than not. That, my friend, is some darn good dating advice for men by women.


 

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